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Do you sleep in your chair? Er...no.
Do you sleep in your chair? Er...no.
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Divya Babbar
Journalist, Columnist, Access All Areas, Living with a Disability in Surrey
This month, Divya Babbar reveals the offensive, ridiculous and frankly absurd things people say to wheelchair users
I was having dinner and, when it was my turn to order, the waiter pointed at me and asked my friend, “And what will she have?”
This wasn’t the first time that someone had underestimated my ability to think and speak. When you’re in a wheelchair, people often think your disability affects your brain and not just your body. The unfamiliarity of being around a disabled person can cause people to come out with the most absurd things. Do they see the unexpected and panic? Are they just ignorant? Maybe a bit of both. Either way, here’s my top pick of the most ridiculous FAQs and opening gambits:
1. “So, what’s wrong with you?” – Many people are under the impression that this is the conversational equivalent of “How are you?” It’s not.
2. “Can you have sex?” – Last time I checked, I still had all my lady parts.
3. “Do you sleep in your chair?” – Just because I can’t walk, it doesn’t mean that I can’t sleep in a bed.
4. “If I were in your shoes, I would never be able to leave the house.”– You’d feel differently if you were. Everybody learns to cope with his/her disadvantages.
5. “You’re so pretty, even though you’re in a wheelchair.” – Thanks!
6. “You should really try to walk instead of relying on your wheelchair. It might help.” – I would if I could, don’t ya think?
7. “Why do you wear shoes if you don’t need them?” – First of all, shoes are fashionable. Second, they keep your feet warm. Third, do you take your shoes off every time you sit down?
8. “Do you have a licence for that thing?” – This question is usually accompanied by a chuckle… it’s not funny.
9. “Do you ever wish that your siblings were disabled instead of you?” – I was asked this question at a university interview and was too stunned to retort, “Do you ever wish your siblings were socially inept instead of you?”
10. “You’re actually really smart. Wow!”
11. "You're so lucky you use a wheelchair and can sit down all day!" – Oh boy, I know, livin’ the dream.
12. “Can I please pray for you?”– No thanks, I’m fine. Pray for people who are starving or dying in war.
13. “Be careful not to run me over!” – Believe me, if I run you over, it won’t be a mistake.
Read more of Divya's work here
Comments (40)
Comment FeedMy favorite moment
Kat more than 9 years ago
That awkward moment...
Derek more than 9 years ago
Confined to a wheelchair
Barbi Lucas more than 9 years ago
The things people say
Christine Regber-Martens more than 9 years ago
your book
hannah more than 9 years ago
Too Young to be Disabled
Bridie more than 9 years ago
Too Young to be Disabled
Amy more than 9 years ago
wheelchair
Alison more than 9 years ago
Wheelchair
Dawnie more than 9 years ago
LOOOL
Reece more than 9 years ago
Disabillaty
Zena GaveyBlindasabat more than 9 years ago
Love It... Brilliant!!!
Kaz Laljee (Positive About MS) more than 9 years ago
I was out with a group of friends
V. Morgan more than 9 years ago
Brilliant
Alison Wood more than 9 years ago
You're beautiful, screw them
Roni more than 9 years ago
Been there, stayed for the second feature....
Drew more than 9 years ago
Sadly All Too Familiar
Kaat more than 9 years ago
I too use a wheelchair
Kelli Hughes more than 9 years ago
Not Today!
Jose more than 9 years ago
OMG. What a scream
Meg Amor more than 9 years ago
If I had a penny for every daft comment
kyleigh more than 9 years ago
Thumbs up
Nathan more than 9 years ago
Heh .
Trialia more than 9 years ago
Good attitude!
Sue Mitchell more than 9 years ago
Yep!
Helen more than 9 years ago
I use a mobility scooter
Celia more than 9 years ago
More…
Mark more than 9 years ago
:)
corinne more than 9 years ago
More...
Gina more than 9 years ago
Reply to mark
Marina more than 9 years ago
More ...
Jane more than 9 years ago
So True
Susan more than 9 years ago
Bravo!
Rajiv Sachdeva more than 9 years ago
Fabulous
Nikki more than 9 years ago
Too true
Annie more than 9 years ago
I've heard the majority of these
Ben more than 9 years ago
I love it!!!
Ericka Camacho more than 9 years ago
Fabulous
Sarah more than 9 years ago
Innocent to rude
saila more than 9 years ago
Innocent to rude
JanK more than 9 years ago