Initiatives to get us talking – particularly in cafés – are on the rise. Catherine Whyte meets Chatty Café Scheme founder Alexandra Hoskyn...
We live in schismatic times. Whatever happened to accords, agreements and entente cordiales?
In the midst of all the Brexit blather, it is refreshing to hear about initiatives designed to bring people closer together. So, when an email popped up in my inbox about Chatter & Natter tables at my local Squire’s Garden Centre, it struck a chord.
“A Chatter & Natter table creates a space for people to talk,” explains founder Alexandra Hoskyn. “Whether for five minutes while you drink a brew or for an hour of good conversation. We’re not trying to build friendships – just simple interactions that may have a big impact on someone’s day.”
With self-service checkouts and ATMs the high street norm, it is perfectly possible to go to the shops and not speak to another human – a situation that will impact more mature members of society, who may not spend every waking hour on Snapchat.
“Even cafés and bars are full of people on their laptops and phones,” adds Alexandra. “People need interaction and they miss it when they don’t have it.”
The tables are part of The Chatty Café Scheme which Alexandra – now a full-time social worker – set up a couple of years ago after a rather dispiriting experience of her own.
“I was sat in a café, with my then baby son, feeling rather lonely and disconnected,” she explains. “As I looked around, I saw an elderly man alone at a table, a carer who seemed to have run out of things to say with the young man he was looking after and an elderly lady – also alone. It struck me at that moment how much we probably all would have enjoyed a conversation together.”
Alexandra began by going into cafés in her hometown of Oldham, Greater Manchester and asking them if they would consider having a Chatter & Natter table. Since then, over 1,000 venues have signed up, including all 16 branches of Squire’s across Surrey and the South East.
“One of our employees brought the scheme to our attention,” says Sarah Squire, company chairman. “She works in the Café Bar at our Woking branch and thought Chatter & Natter tables would be a great way to help those in need of some company. It was a bit of a no-brainer and a great way for us to offer customers a little extra.”
The proof is in the pudding so I popped down to my local Squire’s to try it out.
As I glanced around the café, I immediately noticed that the Chatter & Natter table was populated by three teenage boys who were huddled around a Nintendo Switch – definitely not the ideal candidates for a conversation. Their parents were having a chat on the table next door. The boys looked completely nonplussed when I strolled up and good-naturedly pointed to the sign.
Their parents began to engage immediately though. “Yes! We noticed the sign,” said one, adding, “I think it’s a really good idea – especially for single mums.
“Sometimes you need some other people to talk to when it’s just you and the kids.” Good point.
I left them to it, took the sign, placed it on an empty table and waited. Looking around everyone was in pairs or groups except for a guy on his laptop and a lady – obviously retired – who was sitting there with a cup of tea and a slice of cake.
Would you consider joining me, I asked. She smiled and politely declined explaining that she had simply come for some ‘me time’. Fair enough.
In the end, no one came to join me. It didn’t matter though. I had interacted positively with quite a few people because of the scheme. It also occurred to me that making assumptions is risky business. Just because you are sitting in a coffee shop on your own, doesn’t mean to say that you are lonely. Likewise, you don’t have to be lonely to feel the benefits of a good natter.
Definitely food for thought.
Visit thechattycafescheme.co.uk to find other participating venues in Surrey. There are Chatter & Natter tables every Tuesday morning at all 16 of Squire’s Café Bars, plus most other days too. Visit: squiresgardencentres.co.uk
